Haven't felt up to par the past couple days. Lots of aching and being uncomfortable. It's the food. I never should have strayed from my regular stuff. But the stuffing tasted so good..LOL I threw away all that bad stuff now.
The thought of the Chemo and Radiation is really haunting me. The thought of having surgery is bothering me too. But I know I really should have it all. If I want to live a few more years. I have lots of questions for the radiologist and oncologist. Will it make my cataracts worse? I have baby ones right now. They say it brings them on faster. Will it effect my Glaucoma. Chemo does a job on your eyes they say. What about my bad left lung? I can't breathe that good as it is from that. What about the gallbladder problems and liver??
Surgery can give you blood clots in your legs. I already have enough problems with my legs and varicose veins. What about the shingles that break out on my outer leg almost every month now? Will my nerve endings be even more damaged?
Will it take me longer to walk around, since my legs and stomach muscles are so weak?
I have so many questions. And I'm not sure if I even want to live a longer life.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
November 25, 2009-Wednesday
Had a lot of aching in my rectum today. Wasn't a very good day. I am tired too. But I guess that is because I never sleep too well. Wish I could just fall to sleep as soon as I get in bed at night but I have never been able to do that my whole life. I'm a very light sleeper. Any little noise wakes me up.
I was happy to see my crippled fox last night though! It had been a few days. I wish I could see him closer to see if those bones are really gone. They didn't show up on the photo but that could have been because of the darkness. But I would think that the white would have shown. So maybe he's been back in the woods for the past three days chewing those off. Or maybe his mom helped him. I like to think that she did just because it sounds so neat..Ha! Either way, if the bones are off then he might have a chance of healing and surviving. He looked healthy.
I am not going anywhere for Thanksgiving. I never do. I like staying home. But this year I can't cook any turkey breast like I usually do. But I have plenty of other stuff. I always have squash and I am making some stuffing, although a bit lighter on the butter etc. I always buy those veggie patties now. I like them a lot. They satisfy my craving for any meat.
I also bought a can of pumpkin and added a banana to it and a couple eggs and some canned milk and baked it in a baking dish. It came out almost as good as a pie! I didn't use any sugar but did use a little of that Stevia. But the banana sweetened it enough I think. Added the usual spices. So I'm happy. I'll get back on track Friday.
I want to wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy your day with family and friends and be thankful if you are healthy. We never know when that will change. I am just thankful I have lived this long and have a roof over my head and have family that cares and outside and inside critters to enjoy and keep me busy. And they sure do!
Here's a picture of my poor three legged fox last night.
Monday, November 23, 2009
November 23, 2009-Monday
Wasn't feeling that great today. Aching in my butt. It comes and goes like a toothache. Bothers me more when I go to the bathroom a lot. But I don't want to cut down on my food. I'm too thin as it is now. I weighed 165 Lbs. about 6 months ago. Now I'm down below 135. I lost that mostly when I was on soft foods only and having to fast all the time for those darn tests.
I'm craving some stuffing and Pumpkin pie. Darn it. I think I will make some stuffing anyway. The hell with it. No pie though. I like corn meal stuffing. It's the bread and the butter that will be bad for me but maybe for just one day. Hell. I might be dead tomorrow. I could die any time from something else too. Ha! Ha!
Doctor Delpino's nurse called today. She set an appointment up for me to talk to the oncologist. I told her to go ahead and get me an appointment to talk to the Radiologist also. I want to talk to both of them and hear exactly what they will be doing if I decide to go for it. I still really don't want to though, but then my butt starts aching and I think of the pain I might have at the end. I can't take it either way. I could be in pain the rest of my life just from the radiation treatments. It is so scary.
My appointment with the Radiologist is Dec. 1st at 1:30 in Utica and my appointment with the Oncologist isn't till Dec. 17th. Nothing will be done till after the new year anyway. I still want another blood test before I decide. I want to see what my CEA levels are now compared to a couple months ago. If they have gone higher then I'll know it's getting worse. If they are lower then I will feel that my diet is working. Dr. Delpino says I can have the blood test again. No problem.
I am also going to get all my blood work done again with my primary Dr. Just to see if my cholesterol has gone down. I told her I could do it on my own without going on any of those damn Statin drugs. So I just want to prove something to her.
I haven't spotted my crippled fox since the 20th when I got a photo of him at night back by the woods. It gets dark so early now and they only come after dark now. I do open my window and take flash photos of them but he is never in them. I really have to stop worrying so much about him. It's not good for me.
I finally got all my laundry done the other night. I sure feel good about that!!
That's all for now.
I'm craving some stuffing and Pumpkin pie. Darn it. I think I will make some stuffing anyway. The hell with it. No pie though. I like corn meal stuffing. It's the bread and the butter that will be bad for me but maybe for just one day. Hell. I might be dead tomorrow. I could die any time from something else too. Ha! Ha!
Doctor Delpino's nurse called today. She set an appointment up for me to talk to the oncologist. I told her to go ahead and get me an appointment to talk to the Radiologist also. I want to talk to both of them and hear exactly what they will be doing if I decide to go for it. I still really don't want to though, but then my butt starts aching and I think of the pain I might have at the end. I can't take it either way. I could be in pain the rest of my life just from the radiation treatments. It is so scary.
My appointment with the Radiologist is Dec. 1st at 1:30 in Utica and my appointment with the Oncologist isn't till Dec. 17th. Nothing will be done till after the new year anyway. I still want another blood test before I decide. I want to see what my CEA levels are now compared to a couple months ago. If they have gone higher then I'll know it's getting worse. If they are lower then I will feel that my diet is working. Dr. Delpino says I can have the blood test again. No problem.
I am also going to get all my blood work done again with my primary Dr. Just to see if my cholesterol has gone down. I told her I could do it on my own without going on any of those damn Statin drugs. So I just want to prove something to her.
I haven't spotted my crippled fox since the 20th when I got a photo of him at night back by the woods. It gets dark so early now and they only come after dark now. I do open my window and take flash photos of them but he is never in them. I really have to stop worrying so much about him. It's not good for me.
I finally got all my laundry done the other night. I sure feel good about that!!
That's all for now.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
November 19, 2009-Thursday
I left the house at 3 pm. Was a nice ride up to Rome. Left there at 5 pm and had to drive home in the dark but I made it.
The doctor talked to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wasn't interested in having any Radiation or Chemo. He really tried to explain that I should have it. He's afraid it will grow. The cancer cells have already invaded the walls and he wants to get it out as soon as possible. The tumor is so low in my rectum and it is almost 3 cm, which he calls Stage Three and says it's very, very curable at this stage. He wants me to at least talk to a Radioligist and an Oncologist. I told him to give me a month to think this over. He says he will do the surgery even if I don't want the Chemo and Radiation but wishes I'd have those to be sure it will shrink and that he will get it all.
He explained that he will do the operation endoscopically through my lower stomach and that he won't be cutting through the rectum. He will remove all the bad section and bring down a section from the upper area and reconnect with a stapling procedure. He won't know if I will need a temporary bag until he gets in there. I wouldn't mind a bag for a while if I did have the surgery. I think it might be better to eat with one of those. Otherwise it's a liquid diet for the six weeks it will take to heal. I would have to stay in the hospital in Oneida for a week because of the pain etc.
If I do choose to have the radiation and chemo before surgery then I'd have to make a daily trip to Utica to Faxton Hospital for five weeks straight. I'd only have weekends off. God! That would be dreadful to have to drive through the whole winter up there every single day. I would be getting the Radiation and Chemo at the same time. I'll be burning from the radiation and puking and shitting from the chemo. Damn!! I don't know if I can handle that.
He says that if I don't do anything and let it go, it will be the most painful thing I've ever experienced because it goes all through the pelvic region and there's no pain killer that can work with that. So this is something I have to take into consideration. Deal with the pain of radiation for five weeks or suffer in the end terribly.
He explained why they do the radiation before surgery. He said that radiation damage is permanent and if you have it before then he can take every damaged part out during surgery and he doesn't give radiation after surgery. Just Chemo but some women have refused it after surgery and he says that is up to me. He did explain that Chemo goes out of the body eventually and that is why people recover from it. But radiation cannot be reversed for the people that have it after surgery. The way he explains it all, the radiation is much worse than Chemo. But they do pinpoint it these days so it is only hitting the tumor but might still get some good cells around it and they will be taken out as well during surgery.
My rectum will have to get retrained and it will take a few months but I'd be able to go to the bathroom normally after a while.
So. It looks like I will be going through pain, sickness and being uncomfortable for another year if I decide to do all this. I'm just wondering if it is worth it.
Cripes. I might have a heart attack. That would take care of everything all at once wouldn't it..LOL
There is no easy way out. So now I will sit and think about this for a while. It's a very difficult decision to make. God give me strength, is all I can say.
If I had just gone and had that Colonoscopy three years ago it would have still been a Polyp and would have been removed, according to Dr. Delpino. So go get those Colonoscopies everyone.
I missed seeing any of my foxes this evening. I thought I heard gunshots way off in a distance after 11 pm last night. Deer hunting season starts this weekend. Poor deer.
The doctor talked to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wasn't interested in having any Radiation or Chemo. He really tried to explain that I should have it. He's afraid it will grow. The cancer cells have already invaded the walls and he wants to get it out as soon as possible. The tumor is so low in my rectum and it is almost 3 cm, which he calls Stage Three and says it's very, very curable at this stage. He wants me to at least talk to a Radioligist and an Oncologist. I told him to give me a month to think this over. He says he will do the surgery even if I don't want the Chemo and Radiation but wishes I'd have those to be sure it will shrink and that he will get it all.
He explained that he will do the operation endoscopically through my lower stomach and that he won't be cutting through the rectum. He will remove all the bad section and bring down a section from the upper area and reconnect with a stapling procedure. He won't know if I will need a temporary bag until he gets in there. I wouldn't mind a bag for a while if I did have the surgery. I think it might be better to eat with one of those. Otherwise it's a liquid diet for the six weeks it will take to heal. I would have to stay in the hospital in Oneida for a week because of the pain etc.
If I do choose to have the radiation and chemo before surgery then I'd have to make a daily trip to Utica to Faxton Hospital for five weeks straight. I'd only have weekends off. God! That would be dreadful to have to drive through the whole winter up there every single day. I would be getting the Radiation and Chemo at the same time. I'll be burning from the radiation and puking and shitting from the chemo. Damn!! I don't know if I can handle that.
He says that if I don't do anything and let it go, it will be the most painful thing I've ever experienced because it goes all through the pelvic region and there's no pain killer that can work with that. So this is something I have to take into consideration. Deal with the pain of radiation for five weeks or suffer in the end terribly.
He explained why they do the radiation before surgery. He said that radiation damage is permanent and if you have it before then he can take every damaged part out during surgery and he doesn't give radiation after surgery. Just Chemo but some women have refused it after surgery and he says that is up to me. He did explain that Chemo goes out of the body eventually and that is why people recover from it. But radiation cannot be reversed for the people that have it after surgery. The way he explains it all, the radiation is much worse than Chemo. But they do pinpoint it these days so it is only hitting the tumor but might still get some good cells around it and they will be taken out as well during surgery.
My rectum will have to get retrained and it will take a few months but I'd be able to go to the bathroom normally after a while.
So. It looks like I will be going through pain, sickness and being uncomfortable for another year if I decide to do all this. I'm just wondering if it is worth it.
Cripes. I might have a heart attack. That would take care of everything all at once wouldn't it..LOL
There is no easy way out. So now I will sit and think about this for a while. It's a very difficult decision to make. God give me strength, is all I can say.
If I had just gone and had that Colonoscopy three years ago it would have still been a Polyp and would have been removed, according to Dr. Delpino. So go get those Colonoscopies everyone.
I missed seeing any of my foxes this evening. I thought I heard gunshots way off in a distance after 11 pm last night. Deer hunting season starts this weekend. Poor deer.
Monday, November 16, 2009
November 16, 2009-Monday
My doctor's appointment is Thursday at 3:45 pm in Rome. Cripes. It will be dark before I get back. But he's only in Rome on Thursdays.
I went out today. It was another beautiful, fall day. I rode up over Putts Hill to get back home from Herkimer. Wanted to check that land up behind here to see if there were any posted signs but I didn't see any. So I guess the hunters have free reign to hunt up there.
I was getting worried because I didn't see my fox all day but he showed up just as it was getting dark. I didn't get any photos so couldn't check his leg. But at least he is still out there. He was with another fox tonight. I'm glad of that. I couldn't tell if it was the mother or another sibling.
Didn't feel quite as good as I did yesterday but not bad. A little aching today.
That's all for today. Don't feel like writing much. Wish I was in the mood to do my laundry but I'm not. So it will just have to wait another day. Ha!
I went out today. It was another beautiful, fall day. I rode up over Putts Hill to get back home from Herkimer. Wanted to check that land up behind here to see if there were any posted signs but I didn't see any. So I guess the hunters have free reign to hunt up there.
I was getting worried because I didn't see my fox all day but he showed up just as it was getting dark. I didn't get any photos so couldn't check his leg. But at least he is still out there. He was with another fox tonight. I'm glad of that. I couldn't tell if it was the mother or another sibling.
Didn't feel quite as good as I did yesterday but not bad. A little aching today.
That's all for today. Don't feel like writing much. Wish I was in the mood to do my laundry but I'm not. So it will just have to wait another day. Ha!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
November 15, 2009-Sunday
I do believe that this is the first day in months that I actually felt pretty good. I haven't had any aching in my bowels at all today!! And no bleeding either! It's a miracle!! Maybe, just maybe, this alkalizing diet is working!! I won't get my hopes up but I really do believe that it can work. That growth fell off my leg and the red sore veins on my ankle have gone away now too. I'm hoping that I can stop the growth of that tumor so I won't have to have any surgery. But it will take time. I know the doctors don't want to hear that stuff. All they want to do is cut you up and give all the radiation and chemo they can to you. I'm not saying that it hasn't helped people because it has. But most people won't stick to strict diets either. In fact, a lot of people on chemo will eat all kinds of bad stuff just to keep weight on them. I remember seeing that when my sister Chris was down in Cooperstown all the time getting her Chemo and radiation treatments.
All cancers are different in everyone and our bodies react different to that stuff too. I have this fear that I am allergic to the Chemo. I was down in that Chemo room with Chris one time, sitting in the chair next to her while she had her treatment. She was telling me that the nurses have to be real careful not to drip or splash any of that stuff when they are taking the needles out because it's deadly poison if it gets on your skin. Well. Right after I left there that day my elbow broke out with this bump and it got real read and itched. It was some kind of contact dermatitis that I got off that chair. But the real weird thing is, it did not go away for over a year and now and then it will still itch. All I could ever think of was maybe someone got careless throwing the needles in the garbage and some got on the arm of that chair that day. The garbage receptacle was right next to it. That has always haunted me long before I got this problem of my own.
I am going to demand a Chemo Sensitivity test if I ever have to go through that stuff. I still think that I won't be doing any of that poison though.
Enough of that talk. I had a good day and I don't want to think about all that right now.
I saw my poor three-legged fox briefly this afternoon. The poor thing wanted to come down for his nuts and other food but the people upstairs were right at the window talking loud and he ran back into the woods. I was pissed. They are like a bunch of animals up there. An old guy lives up there and his relatives come to bring him food and they stomp across the floors and make so much noise. Today I put my music on real loud just to drown them out. This was after they scared the fox. I never did see it again. But I did get one photo of him. The poor thing was looking up at a squirrel. He will never climb that tree again or be able to catch a squirrel. I wonder if he will ever be able to hunt for himself again. If not, he will starve to death. They sure can't live on nuts and milk bones and doggie treats like I've been giving them. If I put out meat, the others would probably get it before him. I wish he would come closer so I could feed him better. This is his photo today.
All cancers are different in everyone and our bodies react different to that stuff too. I have this fear that I am allergic to the Chemo. I was down in that Chemo room with Chris one time, sitting in the chair next to her while she had her treatment. She was telling me that the nurses have to be real careful not to drip or splash any of that stuff when they are taking the needles out because it's deadly poison if it gets on your skin. Well. Right after I left there that day my elbow broke out with this bump and it got real read and itched. It was some kind of contact dermatitis that I got off that chair. But the real weird thing is, it did not go away for over a year and now and then it will still itch. All I could ever think of was maybe someone got careless throwing the needles in the garbage and some got on the arm of that chair that day. The garbage receptacle was right next to it. That has always haunted me long before I got this problem of my own.
I am going to demand a Chemo Sensitivity test if I ever have to go through that stuff. I still think that I won't be doing any of that poison though.
Enough of that talk. I had a good day and I don't want to think about all that right now.
I saw my poor three-legged fox briefly this afternoon. The poor thing wanted to come down for his nuts and other food but the people upstairs were right at the window talking loud and he ran back into the woods. I was pissed. They are like a bunch of animals up there. An old guy lives up there and his relatives come to bring him food and they stomp across the floors and make so much noise. Today I put my music on real loud just to drown them out. This was after they scared the fox. I never did see it again. But I did get one photo of him. The poor thing was looking up at a squirrel. He will never climb that tree again or be able to catch a squirrel. I wonder if he will ever be able to hunt for himself again. If not, he will starve to death. They sure can't live on nuts and milk bones and doggie treats like I've been giving them. If I put out meat, the others would probably get it before him. I wish he would come closer so I could feed him better. This is his photo today.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
November 12, 2009-Thursday
It started out real cool this morning, with frost all over the grass but then it warmed up to about 50. It was a beautiful day. I went over to Walmart again to get more food for the foxes.
I spotted the injured one as he was going back into the woods and then again a few minutes later but didn't get a picture of him. He gets scared now when he hears the window open and runs. I think I scared him when he was going back into the woods the first time. I didn't know he was out there and was opening the window to look around better. He seemed to be a little slower today. I sure hope he hasn't got an infection in that leg. It really worries me. And now the weekend is coming up and the hunters will be out there again. I'll be a nervous wreck till February when hunting season is over.
I didn't feel too bad today but am bleeding more and can't go to the bathroom. All that food has got to come out. I sure hope I don't end up with a blockage. Guess I better take more laxatives. if it helps then I have to, even though they are not good for me.
I spotted the injured one as he was going back into the woods and then again a few minutes later but didn't get a picture of him. He gets scared now when he hears the window open and runs. I think I scared him when he was going back into the woods the first time. I didn't know he was out there and was opening the window to look around better. He seemed to be a little slower today. I sure hope he hasn't got an infection in that leg. It really worries me. And now the weekend is coming up and the hunters will be out there again. I'll be a nervous wreck till February when hunting season is over.
I didn't feel too bad today but am bleeding more and can't go to the bathroom. All that food has got to come out. I sure hope I don't end up with a blockage. Guess I better take more laxatives. if it helps then I have to, even though they are not good for me.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
November 11, 2009
I haven't heard from the doctor's office yet so I guess I won't be talking to him till next week. Maybe I should have called and made my own appointment but I'm not in any hurry..Ha!
I didn't see my three legged fox today but I did see the mommy fox. I was happy to see her. Now I know she's okay. Two of the other pups were out there also this evening. The injured one could have snuck down without me seeing it though. I am not at the window constantly.
It wasn't a bad day. Just ached a little. Tomorrow's another day. Not going to write much here tonight. Going to put up my Scrapblog pages on "My Animal Stories" blog now. About the hurt fox. Be back tomorrow.
I didn't see my three legged fox today but I did see the mommy fox. I was happy to see her. Now I know she's okay. Two of the other pups were out there also this evening. The injured one could have snuck down without me seeing it though. I am not at the window constantly.
It wasn't a bad day. Just ached a little. Tomorrow's another day. Not going to write much here tonight. Going to put up my Scrapblog pages on "My Animal Stories" blog now. About the hurt fox. Be back tomorrow.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
November 10, 2009-Tuesday
It wasn't as warm today and was partly cloudy but still not a bad day. I got out and got my groceries. Got lots of organic veggies and a few other items I found in the organic section. I finally found Bragg's Liquid Aminos. It taste great on the veggies! I bought some brown rice tortillas but I don't like them so won't be eating them. I like the sprouted grain tortillas. Got some black olives that were cured in olive oil too. I never used to like them things but now I love them! Very alkalizing. Bought more Avacados. I love chopping them with fresh red sweet peppers. I don't put too much in it though. Just a little sea salt and chili powder. I gave up on the lemons. They seem to bother me. Even though they are supposed to turn alkaline in your body, some people can't handle them and I think I'm one of them. I don't need them. I got my green powder. I found my Almond butter too! Now I can eat some of that. Almonds are very alkalizing. The only nut that is really. But I didn't want to be eating the whole almonds for fear I wouldn't chew them good enough and it would cause more bleeding. I bleed every day as it is.
Good news! I saw my injured fox late this afternoon. He has chewed the dangling foot off . Now I wish he'd chew that protruding bone down so he would heal good. He has that bigger bone and then a smaller one that is sticking out.. If he can just get it to heal then maybe he won't get Gangrene in it. But the DEC guy says he needs to have skin covering it to heal. I worry about that. And what if he catches that bone on something... It makes me get the chills just to think about it. The poor thing. He was just sitting out on the grass watching all the little birds and wishing he could chase them probably.
Good news! I saw my injured fox late this afternoon. He has chewed the dangling foot off . Now I wish he'd chew that protruding bone down so he would heal good. He has that bigger bone and then a smaller one that is sticking out.. If he can just get it to heal then maybe he won't get Gangrene in it. But the DEC guy says he needs to have skin covering it to heal. I worry about that. And what if he catches that bone on something... It makes me get the chills just to think about it. The poor thing. He was just sitting out on the grass watching all the little birds and wishing he could chase them probably.
Monday, November 9, 2009
November 9, 2009-Monday
I can't believe how warm it was here today! Almost 70!! I went to Walmart to pick up a couple things. Wanted to go to Hannaford's to get groceries but my knee was hurting too much today. That left knee always bothers me because of the foot not being stable. Knocks my knee out a lot. And I think I'm hurting it climbing up on the low stool to see over the rock wall better. I can't get a good view of the foxes unless I'm on that stool. So I better take it easy. I came right home after Walmart. maybe tomorrow I can go get groceries. I'm running low on my veggies.
I'm sprouting Garbonzo beans right now to make Hummus with. I'd rather make my own than buy it premade. Lots of good enzymes when you sprout them. I'm eating tortillas now too. A half one with the hummus and veggies on it. I get the organic tortillas that are yeast free. I'm slowly trying more things. I am also eating the veggie burgers smothered in my own fresh veggies. That way I at least feel like I'm eating something good..LOL I like those Morning Star brands. I tried another brand but they fell apart. I am trying large curd cottage cheese again but make sure I eat it with a banana. If I eat it alone it kills me. It has to large curd. It's more alkalizing. So far it's working. The banana has to be real ripe also. It's highly alkalized that way. If I don't wait for them to get real ripe then they are acidic. Got to stay away from anything too acidic and balance everything off so it stays neutral. My PH level is getting up there where I want it now. I was so acidic. I'm finally seeing improvement! I eat more raw veggies than lightly steamed too. That is very important. But I do steam my broccoli just till it turns bright green but still crispy. I do bake my squashes though but make sure I eat raw veggies also. I've been eating lots of cucumbers, peeled and the seeds taken out. I still have to be careful that nothing rubs that tumor and makes it bleed.
I was bleeding quite a bit today but at least I went to the bathroom good. Made me feel so much better.
About the fox.
I did not see the injured fox at all today. I am worried about him. His two other siblings came this evening but not him. I did hear from the DEC guy that I write to now and then about the animals. He said if I don't hear from the local people then to call him and he will try to get me some help maybe live trapping the fox and getting him into Rehab and a Vet. He says the only way that fox will make it is to get that bone ground down and heal him up as best they can over the winter and then bring him back to his family. Otherwise he will most likely die. But he might be able to make it if the leg heals, even though he won't be able to walk on it. With that bone sticking out like that, it hasn't got enough skin to heal over and has to be cut off. before Gangrene sets in.
I'm afraid they won't be able to trap him though. That fox will probably never go near another trap if that is what caused it. I'll just have to wait and see what happens. If I never see him again then that means he's lying sick somewhere and dying a slow death. That is what bothers me the most. I'd rather see him killed instantly than die like that.
I haven't seen the mommy fox in a few days now either. She has lived around here for a few years and survived. This is the first year I've ever heard gunshots too. I guess I probably won't be seeing any more babies next year. I sure did enjoy them this year. I might not be here next year as it is. Never know what is in store for us from day to day in this world.
Okay. That's enough rambling for tonight. I'm going to bed. Take care everyone.
I'm sprouting Garbonzo beans right now to make Hummus with. I'd rather make my own than buy it premade. Lots of good enzymes when you sprout them. I'm eating tortillas now too. A half one with the hummus and veggies on it. I get the organic tortillas that are yeast free. I'm slowly trying more things. I am also eating the veggie burgers smothered in my own fresh veggies. That way I at least feel like I'm eating something good..LOL I like those Morning Star brands. I tried another brand but they fell apart. I am trying large curd cottage cheese again but make sure I eat it with a banana. If I eat it alone it kills me. It has to large curd. It's more alkalizing. So far it's working. The banana has to be real ripe also. It's highly alkalized that way. If I don't wait for them to get real ripe then they are acidic. Got to stay away from anything too acidic and balance everything off so it stays neutral. My PH level is getting up there where I want it now. I was so acidic. I'm finally seeing improvement! I eat more raw veggies than lightly steamed too. That is very important. But I do steam my broccoli just till it turns bright green but still crispy. I do bake my squashes though but make sure I eat raw veggies also. I've been eating lots of cucumbers, peeled and the seeds taken out. I still have to be careful that nothing rubs that tumor and makes it bleed.
I was bleeding quite a bit today but at least I went to the bathroom good. Made me feel so much better.
About the fox.
I did not see the injured fox at all today. I am worried about him. His two other siblings came this evening but not him. I did hear from the DEC guy that I write to now and then about the animals. He said if I don't hear from the local people then to call him and he will try to get me some help maybe live trapping the fox and getting him into Rehab and a Vet. He says the only way that fox will make it is to get that bone ground down and heal him up as best they can over the winter and then bring him back to his family. Otherwise he will most likely die. But he might be able to make it if the leg heals, even though he won't be able to walk on it. With that bone sticking out like that, it hasn't got enough skin to heal over and has to be cut off. before Gangrene sets in.
I'm afraid they won't be able to trap him though. That fox will probably never go near another trap if that is what caused it. I'll just have to wait and see what happens. If I never see him again then that means he's lying sick somewhere and dying a slow death. That is what bothers me the most. I'd rather see him killed instantly than die like that.
I haven't seen the mommy fox in a few days now either. She has lived around here for a few years and survived. This is the first year I've ever heard gunshots too. I guess I probably won't be seeing any more babies next year. I sure did enjoy them this year. I might not be here next year as it is. Never know what is in store for us from day to day in this world.
Okay. That's enough rambling for tonight. I'm going to bed. Take care everyone.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
November 8, 2009
I also seen something tonight that disturbed me real bad. One of my fox pups has been shot in the leg and it has shattered his bone. I can see the bone sticking out. He will never be able to walk on it again and might die from it. He was my favorite one too. I cried over that. I am so sad for him. You can see the video on my Photography blog. Link is on this page. Please excuse my swearing at the end of that video. I should have taken the sound off.
I've heard gunshots for the past two mornings at 5:30 am. And the lady upstairs heard two shots last night at 10:30. It seems awful close to this building to be shooting. I guess all the fox pups will be dead before winter. I got too attached to them and I know it's my fault. But they were so damn cute and the mother has been around for a few years and wanted me to see her pups.
Friday, November 6, 2009
November 6, 2009
I wasn't feeling that great all day yesterday. Had that aching and I couldn't go to the bathroom all day and never did till this morning. I took a laxative though. I didn't want that food sitting in there any longer. Didn't sleep that well all night but at least I feel a little better today. Guess I just need more rest. I'm not going out till tomorrow. I have to get a few more groceries and critter food. It's supposed to be warmer this weekend. No snow yet, thank heavens!
Ricky, my Cockatiel, is sitting behind me as I type and he makes clicking noises like the sound of the keys when I type. Ha! Ha! He is a pain but he's company also.
I'm still not going to let them do any surgery till after the holidays.
Oh! Remember that growth I was talking about on my leg? Well, it has fallen off!! That's a good sign that my alkalizing diet is working. There is still a red spot but the top part is all gone! I am happy because maybe the tumor will stop growing too. I sure hope so. It's amazing what the right foods can do to your body. Or what the wrong ones can do also! I guess it's true what they say. We are what we eat.
I'll be back another time. Take care everyone.
Ricky, my Cockatiel, is sitting behind me as I type and he makes clicking noises like the sound of the keys when I type. Ha! Ha! He is a pain but he's company also.
I'm still not going to let them do any surgery till after the holidays.
Oh! Remember that growth I was talking about on my leg? Well, it has fallen off!! That's a good sign that my alkalizing diet is working. There is still a red spot but the top part is all gone! I am happy because maybe the tumor will stop growing too. I sure hope so. It's amazing what the right foods can do to your body. Or what the wrong ones can do also! I guess it's true what they say. We are what we eat.
I'll be back another time. Take care everyone.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
November 4, 2009-The Ultra Sound
I got through that procedure okay. I don't know a thing yet. I have to go back to Rome next week and have a talk with the surgeon. But at least everything went well today and I was out of there by 1:30. Didn't have any pain at all but I think they gave me pain medication when they knocked me out.
Jane and I drove to Rick and Ann's little cottage and had a nice visit with them. What a beautiful spot they have there. Deep in the woods with a fast running creek behind them. Rick has done a beautiful job remodeling the inside. I wish the sun had been out at that time so the pictures would have been nicer. He has another building that he is going to remodel soon.
I got home about 4:30. I was so hungry and it felt good to eat something. After a while I started feeling uncomfortable so I guess the pain killer wore off. I'm tired too and am going to bed real early tonight.
That Oneida Hospital was the cleanest one I've ever been in. I was really surprised and happy! The room where I had to lie in one of those cubicles before having the procedure done was real private too. NOT like that at St. Lukes. I hated that room. Anyone that walked in could see us..
And we are in another area for recovery also.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
November 3, 2009
I'm eating very lightly today so I won't have much in me when I go for that Ultra Sound up my butt tomorrow morning. God! I hate these tests!
I was very uncomfortable yesterday and bleeding more. Today isn't so bad. I associate that with what I'm eating. I do chop up most of my veggies in the processor but have been eating some skinless and seedless cucumbers dipped in my hummus or guacamole dip. I sure am glad the avocados have dropped in price. They were $1.88 each and now they are a $1.00. I eat raw zucchini also. The tiny ones. They are tender.
Today I'm sticking to my green powder mix and I did have some squash soup that my sister, Jeanne brought me. I mixed it with my spaghetti squash and processed it till smooth. But for the rest of the day I will be drinking my green powder mixture.
At least for this procedure I won't have to drink that awful Gatorade stuff again. The scope will only be inserted a few inches in with that ultra sound device on the end of it. I will probably be given an enema beforehand. I hope I'm not too sore when they get done probing. And I guess I should get back home as soon as I can instead of going to Rick's. They say I need to rest for 24 hours after that. And I'm sure Jane will want to get back as soon as she can too. It's her day off and she has to cart me around.
I'm still thinking about the surgery. I still don't want it because of the radiation and chemo that I'd have to get before the surgery and the six months after it. I'd be in agony for almost a half year. I am still going to put it off till after the holidays. I want to make Christmas this year at Jeanne's. I couldn't go last year because of all my problems but I feel so much better now and I can handle going.
I'll be back to let you know how things went after tomorrow.
I was very uncomfortable yesterday and bleeding more. Today isn't so bad. I associate that with what I'm eating. I do chop up most of my veggies in the processor but have been eating some skinless and seedless cucumbers dipped in my hummus or guacamole dip. I sure am glad the avocados have dropped in price. They were $1.88 each and now they are a $1.00. I eat raw zucchini also. The tiny ones. They are tender.
Today I'm sticking to my green powder mix and I did have some squash soup that my sister, Jeanne brought me. I mixed it with my spaghetti squash and processed it till smooth. But for the rest of the day I will be drinking my green powder mixture.
At least for this procedure I won't have to drink that awful Gatorade stuff again. The scope will only be inserted a few inches in with that ultra sound device on the end of it. I will probably be given an enema beforehand. I hope I'm not too sore when they get done probing. And I guess I should get back home as soon as I can instead of going to Rick's. They say I need to rest for 24 hours after that. And I'm sure Jane will want to get back as soon as she can too. It's her day off and she has to cart me around.
I'm still thinking about the surgery. I still don't want it because of the radiation and chemo that I'd have to get before the surgery and the six months after it. I'd be in agony for almost a half year. I am still going to put it off till after the holidays. I want to make Christmas this year at Jeanne's. I couldn't go last year because of all my problems but I feel so much better now and I can handle going.
I'll be back to let you know how things went after tomorrow.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Today Is My Birthday
Made a card for myself !! Ha! Ha!
Had a nice day. My sister, Jeanne stopped by then my sister, Debby and then my daughter and grandchildren. I felt pretty good all day. Just some minor aching. I'm very tired now and going to bed. My birds will be on the old time and will start squawking an hour earlier now.
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